Wounds

“Everybody hurts” is a well-known and popular song by REM. I guess one reason is that it resonates with most people one way or the other. We all hurt, we all have been hurt, and we also hurt other people. It is a circle where many spend much of their time and life.

We all need to experience love. And the less attention and love we were shown in our early days, the more we crave it when we’re older. No wonder the Christian focus on the Father heart of God is very popular both in preaching and reading. Most of us have been wounded by our parents slightly or deeply. And I guess very often the father is most lacking in love and acceptance. This partly because the feminine and nurturing side of men has been less embraced and therefore less developed. It’s not only the women who have suffered in a patriarchal society.

But okey, we are all wounded, so what can we do about it? I believe we need more love, acceptance and healing. If we open our eyes and realise how wound driven we are in our actions, it is possible to experience a deeper satisfaction, not only through the love of a Higher Father, but through the experience of self love. Self love has a bad reputation, and sadly, because it quiet different from self worship.

It is therefore paramount that our suffering and craving, leads us on a road through our blindness. The grass is not greener on the other side of the fence, especially when what we’re looking for is the love we lacked in our childhood.

Before we can bring the deepest and purest love and healing to others we often need to love and heal ourselves. This process consists of developing an acceptance and love for ourselves, and at the same time a realization that we are deeply loved by the Love that gave us life.

This healing I am pointing too, has no easy route. But a good way to start is to take a deep look at your wounds. Not to fall into the wounds and drown, but sense your wounds enough for you to be able to both grieve, forgive and accept them. This involves forgiving others, but very often also, since you may be quite grown up when you truly see this, it also includes forgiving yourself. I guess many we will be in this process for much of their lives, if they want to grow in love. Still, at first, it’s important to start, to embrace more and more of the pain, so you may grow through so much of it that you become free enough to be of more help to others, instead of clinging to people and things for love and acceptance. You may even become a much needed wounded healer as Henri Nouwen wisely wrote about, and the love grown out of wounds eventually becomes a gift to this often hurting world.

We need to come to our senses and to ourselves, as the prodigal son also had to do, in order to direct his life towards the great Source of Love again. And like this lost son, we often get lost in craving love from things and people, that cannot give us what we now must give ourselves, and what we also must receive from our Mother, Father God. A Divine presence that waits for and even chases us from around and from the deepest parts of our souls.

Ask yourself today, what drives your actions the most today? Is it the lack of contentment and a need for lost love, or have you walked the valley of grief and forgiveness, and come out of it, with a new or renewed selflove? At least, stop blaming and pulling yourself down. What you have not received, you cannot pass on. Those wise words I leave you with, and at last an important reminder: You are loved ❤️

Now and Forever

Open my heart wide, so I may see
Open my heart wide, so I may let go
Open my heart wide, so I may know
You, my Lover and Love

Help me bow down deeply, so I may drink
Help me stretch far, so I may pluck
Help me sit down quietly, so I may dine
Last, help me walk gently, so I may bless
With You, my Lover and Love

Now and forever

Overflowed by Life

At the beach yesterday I witnessed the image above of stones and overflowing waters. Tumultuous waves were overcoming solid ground. Rohr (Falling Upwards, great book!) speaks and talks about a lever to stand. The lever is needed at different times in our lives. Some times outer pressure or inner turmoil are overwhelming. It feels like drowning.

I’ve been through times like the mentioned above on several occasions. Last not so long ago. I lost my zest for life and had no drive or motivation. It felt like I was overcome and lost, as in my last poem here, “I gave up and gave in”.

If you have read the whole poem though you have realized I have yet to draw my last breath, and gracefully things ended on a good note. I am meant to live and there’s still meaning and renewed meaning to be found in life, mine included. But for a long time it felt like the image above. Out of control, with no escape in going through the pain and darkness. Part of the reason for my troubles were great grief in my life, since I have slowly been losing my mother to early dementia. There has been other things too, among those an earnest search for truth and the deep desire for love and union with Spirit.

So if you’re experiencing grief and outer and/or more inner turmoil, know that I have been there. Hell is not a place in a God-willed afterlife. God’s love is for all, it upholds us all, whether we recognize it or not. Hell is also at times circumstances here on Earth, whether it is outer war and suffering, or inner turmoil and loneliness deep within. Fortunately, at the same time, heaven, God, God’s kingdom are also here on Earth, all around us and deep within each and everyone. This includes you, no exceptions. I also do believe with Rob Bell, that Love Wins (book recommended!). If that makes me an universialist, I am guilty of the “heresy”.

The Spirit of Christ lives within us and our bodies groan for freedom and union for eternity. Happily, this is something to be embraced and experienced in the now, if only in glimpses. Can you sense your inner Spirit calling you? Are you overwhelmed by the life you have lived so far? Maybe what we need when there is no solid ground to be found, is a surrender to the great vast Ocean? At least a surrender to the River within that Jesus spoke of to the Samaritan woman.

Now I dream of new projects and a future for contemplation in my country and across the globe. I connect with what Rahner supposedly has said, that the future Christian is a mystic. I truly believe that. I want to be among them. I do think more and more people will see and find the path of contemplation. Nothing else than contemplating the mystery of the Divine and beholding and experiencing its beauty can satisfy our hunger. Would you like to join me on this often messy but also blessed journey?

Blessings on your day and your further travel – never forget you truly are the beloved of the Great Lover! Even more, when darkness leaves you blinded.

Belief/Faith?

In the English language, there is a distinction made between belief and faith, belief in a particular doctrine or deeper trust. We probably need both, but I find more rest and wider horizons in trust. Then my life is less limited to what I believe, and more a liberating flow of life that my heart opens and surrenders to. This is a trust in a Creative Love first, creation and people second.

Truth

Teknologi, Hender, Avtalen, Greit, Skjermen

A friend once said to me, “all you need is to wonder”. I do believe it is important to wonder about life, be curious and to ask questions. As I grow older, I sometimes think I know less and less. At the same time, I believe in what Jesus said, you shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free. But again, what is really true or really the truth? Maybe the a truth is that there is so much we will not know on this side of eternity, that by accepting that as true, this will lead to us the experience of greater freedom in life?

Still, I do believe we need silence and contemplation in our lives in order to find truth, in ourselves, in our relations and experiences. So many of us are running from one thing to another. So many of us spend hours upon hours in front of screens, whether it is the computer screen, mobile or tv. It is so easy to become trapped and addicted, if we don’t make the extra effort to choose wisely how we spend our time.

A teacher once said that young people today can’t concentrate for longer than the duration of a Tik-Tok-video. This may be an extreme statement, but it is also partly true. We probably have to accept that the world has become a lot more digital, and of course digital tools can be helpful, and they have also helped us especially in these Corona times. But I do believe we are in danger of partly losing our souls and becoming more superficial if we don’t take the time just BEING without too many distractions, and if we don’t prioritize to spend time in silence and contemplation.

To be continued…

Unbury Your Soul, Maybe?

Lonebirdflying

Maybe it is time to unbury your soul?

Maybe it is time to find your true voice?

Maybe it is time for the world to meet the real you?

Maybe it is time to be your own authority?

Maybe it is time to listen within?

Maybe it is time to worry less about what other people say?

Maybe it is time to choose your own way?

Maybe it is time to find your soul?

Maybe it is time for soul to find you?

Maybe it is time to get off the carousel?

Maybe it is time to sit down and rest?

Maybe it is time to follow your inner calling?

Maybe it is time to unbury your soul?

What is your answer to life calling you from within?

#Rest

Poem slightly inspired by the story of the Mount of Transfiguration.

Rest

Early morning
Got up to rest
Away from the stress
Alone with myself

Pressure from all sides
Heaviness within
Tiredness in face
Sorrow in heart

Would rather escape
This pain arising
Too much to handle
Too much to care

Sipping my coffe
Clearing my mind
Still ready to give up
No desire to drink this cup

Alone with The Alone
Here I am again
Forgotten my way
Yet the I Am is here

Trust in spite of pain
When death feels like freedom
That Love soon again
Will shine like the Son

 

Please note: This poem is not an encouragement to give up on life, rather an anknowledgment of how painful and stressful life can be. The poem also communicates the belief in love and hope in the life we are living. If you are experiencing very difficult times please reach out to someone you can trust and/or ask for professional help. Remember, there is always a way through so we must and can keep living our lives ❤️