Finding your true self

You see

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You see when life hurts a lot
You see when I grieve
Grieving over the time that has been, and that cannot come back

When I have no strength and cannot fight anymore, you carry me
That I must believe

You see when what once gave meaning and joy, does not do so anymore
What was worth spending time on before, has lost its shine

You see the pain, the pain of life
You see how the heart bursts of longing
Longing for you and for love

You see when tears come
You see when tears press on and begins flowing
You see longings, loss and pain

You see when I need to breathe
You see when something must die
You see, I am not alone

You see the way I and we should walk
You see where we started and you see where it leads

You see my face, my eyes, my soul
You see me in my innermost
You see my heart

You see when I try to explain, and others do not understand the way I walk
You see when I want to convince, but cannot

You see what no one else sees
You see the depths, you see my soul
You see the soul that wants to break boundaries and breathe in freedom

You see when life needs more nourishment through friendship, fellowship and shared thoughts and ideas

You see when one wants what is experienced as meaningful
And hopes the other can find more joy in some of it

You see when what is for freedom and peace for one, creates fear in the other one
You see the one who thinks one has got something, and the other who is afraid of losing something

To find something one must be able to lose something or embrace and at the same time include

You see it hurts when the other says one cannot follow you on the way
You see when I think I have to go alone

You see the hearts that want what’s good for others and themselves
You see the hearts in their every thing

You see and love what and who you see
Face to face you love
You see us as we are
Still you love us

You see me when I’m about to fall asleep
When another day is over and a new day soon will be welcomed

You see, so that it brings light to our hearts and souls
Your gaze can warm us when love has little room

You see everything
You see it as it is
That’s just how it is
Your gaze never leaves me

Divine Blindness

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Open Eyes

Is it not true? That there is a season for everything as the Old Book tells us? Everything is continually changing and transforming. Life is flowing in dynamical ways. And you and I and we get to partake in this eternal flow of life. It is tricky, it is sad, it is so full of grief, yet so full of longing, joy, beauty and creativity.

The winter time, in real life and spiritually too, can be a dark and cold time, a time of hiding in the quietness. Yet also, this time of coldness and dying, is a preparation, a silent growing of new lifeflow. There can be great pain in the dying which is part of a new creation.

I love the story of the prodigal son in the New Testament, particularly the phrase, ‘then he came to himself’. Dying and renewal is painful, but also a transformation into new ways of seeing. This deep dive into dark mystery can create a new sense of aliveness and a deeper joy.

But again, the grief, the pain can be very dark. It can feel like all hope is lost. You feel lost at sea, with no shore in sight. I am reminded by Paul’s blindness after the bright revelation of Jesus on the road to Damascus. He could not see for several days. But there was a divine working taking place deep within him. This was not a time for his ordinary senses, only a time for transformational blindness.

Somewhere in the prophet book of Isaiah it is said that God will tell us secrets in the dark times. Maybe in days of darkness we are divinely blinded? You may feel like you shut down for a time, but is it only for change and renewal to take hold?

Does this make sense to you? Do you believe in change and transformation? Can you trust that along with the pain there is also a rebirth of new life? Could it be that when our eyes eventually are opened we are in for a great surprise?

Blessings to you!

Dove Above

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The Dove above

Is there to show

He is The Beloved One

This Dove is Love

*

The Dove above

Is there to let you know

You are the beloved

This Dove is Love

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The Dove above

Is there to say when one goes

One will be with the Beloved

This Dove is Love

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The Dove above

Is there to help us see

Humanity is one in the Beloved

This Dove above

Is Love

Circles of Love

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Widening Circles 2

As my heart opens
In widening circles
I see more
The beauty of creation

In ever widening circles
My soul senses
The flame
Of a lovingkindness

It is befriending me
In widening circles
This is the deepest love
Yet I hunger for more

In ever widening circles
Forever and ever
This Love is

For all

Inspired by Rilke

Hope – What if…

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Hope displayed by Anemone flowers

What if I tell you there is hope, there is always hope? Would you blame me for just conveying the biggest cliché? The all-time-high lie that we tell people when they’re suffering and can’t find their way through the wilderness of sorrow? But what if, what if it is true?

The worrying monkey-mind often keeps repeating these terrible and fear inspiring “what ifs”. What if this is what he thinks of me? What if I am going to die from an awful disease? What if the plane falls down? What if I won’t pass this exam? What if I am going to loose my job? What if I can’t find help for my problem? What if there is no goodness in this world? What if, what if, what if….constantly repeating.

Another cliché is, yes, I have been there too. Like that’s very comforting in the middle of the deepest pain? And maybe it’s just something people say anyway to give others some false comfort, or even in order to turn the focus on themselves when the other person is the one truly suffering? But again, what if it’s true?

What if there is hope? What if I have been there? What if I’ve been to this really dark place where I had no hope of returning to the living? Would you believe me if I told you about it? Would it be an important message to you if you are the one now that has gone all dark?

I am telling you, whispering softly and shouting loudly again, THERE IS HOPE!! Yes, I’ve been there, and yes, I have returned, even though I didn’t think it was possible. I gave up everything, but something brought me deeply back to life. Back to colors and back to the joy of living.

Now I am sensing this energy breaking barriers within, and this river flowing again from within to without. Now I want to express myself and share the good news! If you will listen, dear, beloved, of God. There is hope! There is I way through! I know some of you don’t think so. I did too. But was surprised by the help I found. Reach out, and next maybe to your complete surprise, you’ll find new life from within and all around.

Blessings and new light to you, as you journey true your deep pain and darkness. There will be light again! There is hope! Always!

PS! Reading other posts on this blog, may partly help you find your way. This blog has followed me through later life, and what I share here is mostly from my own experience or inner longing.

Union

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rivers to river again

Today I am thinking about the beautiful word ‘union’. For me this word has a deep meaning. First and foremost I have my whole life longed for a union with God and truth. I do believe this longing for union with the Divine, is in the heart of every man, whether we acknowledge it or not. I also believe we all, regardless of faith or beliefs, experience smaller and greater unions throughout life. In my mind I picture union being a giving and sharing of love.

A giving and sharing of love is not dependent on wisdom or faith. The only prerequisite is being human and being able to be vulnerable and open at times. If we are to experience union with something or someone, there has to be an openness towards the experience. Also an openness and acceptance towards ourselves first and then others second.

Since union and loving union is about giving we need to know what we give. In order to give from ourselves, we need to know something true about ourselves, accept ourselves and love aspects of ourselves.

Union is beautiful, it is a giving and sharing of love, a giving and receiving between at least two persons or a person and beauty of some kind. Union is seeing your own beauty so clearly that you enjoy sharing it with someone or something other beautiful. Again, this is dependent on acceptance and the gift of vulnerability.

A good friendship is an example of an union. The closest friendship and deepest union, can only develop through openness and daring to be vulnerable. A deep friendship between humans, or humans and animals for that matter, can be a symbol of the deepest union man can experience in life, and eventually in death, the union with God, the All-loving One.

Looking at the image above makes me think of people and different aspects of life as smaller or bigger rivers. The rivers are always flowing, always alive, either wildly or softly, but always moving. Since rivers are about movement, it is always a continual giving of life. All the smaller rivers can join the bigger river or lake and then become rivers again, before they are back again. All are part of this union, this never-ending circle of beautiful life.

Maybe you are not with me on this whole vision, but please follow me on this. You are a river of beautiful and vulnerable love moving towards others and other things, desiring acceptance and union. And do remember, in order to unite, we must love and accept ourselves. Only then can you give yourself and receive the other in true union. Now, are you ready for a reunion!?