Now is a time for dreams unfolding
Thoughts and feelings unloading
It is a time for new visions
In fires and through darkness these seeds have grown
Former flowers were burnt to ashes
New seeds were sown
These seeds have grown into form
New visions for times to come
An unfolding of quiet glory
It is bliss transmuted from darkness
Bright darkness had blinded you
Yet now, your thorns have been removed
Your eyes have healed
And sight will return
It is no time to argue
It is no time to divide
It is no time to hide
It is no time to fight
Let us face it now
God is love
The one who loves is of God
In heart and in action
Let us not kill what we do not know
Let us not put on a mask just for show
Let it be and let be
Let love rise above
In my soul there is a room that opens doors into my eyes, body and senses. Often I sense a hushing of a wind. I also hear a quiet whisper of a beautiful voice.
Yet this is not all.
If I sit in a restful quietness these voices, hushings and whisperings turn into complete silence. Beautiful they are.
But now no thing is happening.
Everything waits.
As I sit.
In silence.
My senses, body and eyes grow accustomed to the silence.
Soon I rise and walk.
Out into this life of every thing.
Suddenly something starts rising within.
I almost feel like singing or jumping for joy.
Because everywhere I am looking and sensing I see and hear transferring and transforming from deepest within.
The beautiful singing of a thousand mornings.
I just started reading again today in Michael Singer’s follow-up book to the amazing The Untethered Soul. This second book is called Living Untethered, and seems to be just as full of wise nuggets of gold as the first book.
Some time ago I had this experience of being a watcher to and observer of the outside world. It was a difficult time in my life or about to come difficult at least. What I saw was that I was kind of outside the physical world, yet still there passing through as I was driving by some familiar places in my car. It was as me being there didn’t have an impact. Everything was happening whether I was there or not. An experience like this can bring forth sadness, still the experience was profound in its nature. Even though it felt like a dying at the time, it can later be seen from another perspective. It is this other perspective Martin Singer explains so well. That’s why I recommend reading his books so much.
The first title of this text that I later changed was “What the Mystic Sees”. I changed it because I want to express that this seeing is not something only a chosen few can see. Indeed, it is available for everyone. The mystical way is not some occult or obscure spiritual tradition. It is actually about seeing who you really are.
To me it has become clear partly by digesting the wisdom of Michael Singer’s books among others, and partly through my own experience. I will stress the last point, experience, it is of great importance. Do not underestimate your own experience! Some of you may have grown up in traditions or churches that didn’t value your own personal experience and reasoning. That is very dangerous.
So what did I find through my own personal experience and when do I experience this truth most clearly? Let me explain in just a few more words.
I have found through my own personal experience that in the deepest sense I am not my thoughts and feelings, I am something other. Singer would call it the Observer. Gary Zukav would call it the Seat of Self. I have found, like them that there is a huge difference between the personal ego and the deepest observing self. The example from my life I mentioned earlier was more of an observer’s experience than an ego personal experience, or maybe it was an experience of both.
Do you see it too? I am sure you have had this experience of time standing still, and just being in the moment, forgetting both thoughts and feelings? That’s what I am talking about. I am so happy I have experienced this truth because it frees me to live more in peace, and even more confidently since you go from a tendency to trust instead of fear.
So how to experience this as a more continual experience? This is where contemplation and silence come in. Some people practice sitting in silence for some minutes every day. Some call it Centering prayer (Thomas Keating), and practice 20 minutes of silence twice daily. Whatever you do, if you want to experience more of this other Self, I do believe we at least need to practice some silence, reading, reflecting, yet also even go for hikes in nature. It is in nature we often experience these beautiful and transcending moments of time standing still.
One last point I would like to make is that once you have crossed the line and live more in this mystical way, it will actually be easier to be you, both in your ego and in soul. When you realize deeply that feelings and thoughts are not all you are, and even maybe not what you truly are, it will get easier to work on and with your ego, so your ego can become the best version of itself and more useful to you. You may notice critical feedback will hurt you less, because there is not really your deepest self that is hurt, but your personal ego. Do you see it? I promise, it makes a world of difference if you do!
Recommended first reading: The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer.
Today I am thinking about the desperate need for wise teachers, instead of blind preachers. Growing up in the Pentecostal movement in Norway has given me good things, but also a lot of wounds and bad things. The good thing is the focus on the Holy Spirit and joy. Bad things are a negative view on the human soul and the world. I have had to do a lot of painful relearning and reconstruction in my now soon 50 years on this Earth.
I remember one Pentecostal preacher preaching to a big congregation, we are all zeros!! But, he said, Jesus is a number one, so with him we are a million! Outrageous, I thought in my then literal thinking teenager mind, and confronted this preacher with is terrible lowlife preaching. Why do you preach so negatively about God’s beloveds I asked him. His sad, and even only answer, was, I guess that’s how I often feel, like a zero. To me this is a good example of the blind preaching I am talking about. You are zeros, because I, your pastor, feels that way. Wow!!
Instead of the message above, a wise teaching could be, Jesus is one, because he was one with God, and so are you. When you feel like a lowlife, you should know, this is not how God feels and thinks about you. He loves you, never leaves you and He/She/They lives/live within you. As the Celtics even say, our not soul in our body, but even our body is in the Soul! Amen!!
I am very thankful for the wise teachers and guides that I have met on my path and in my search in the wilderness and even despair. Henri Nouwen was one of them. I fed on his books, and remember the very small but important book, The Inner Voice of Love. Wow, what I message, what a healing! He even wrote a book called Wounded Healer, another great blessing.
I could also mention other wise guides like Michael Singer, and his The Untethered Soul, and Richard Rohr and his Everything Belongs (the title itself says it all!) and Falling Upward. In Falling Upward Rohr shares his vision in a distilled form, about the second journey in life. Also, let us not forget his important inspiration, the spiritual psychoanalyst Carl Jung.
So, instead of many more details today, I leave you with this important note: seek out some of the wise teachers with the honest, transformational message and wisdom. And step away from blind preachers that only pull you down and hurt you. Yes, step away and seek soul. You’ll truly know it when you find food freeing to your soul.
Since I believe in contemplation I also lean on grace and surrender to the mystical way. So do some reading, sit in silence and surrender to the Love and Guidance you have within. Bless you!
Sunday morning
Alone at the cottage
Alone with myself
God and the wind
Got here last night
Tired and frustrated
Discouraged
I have wounded and been wounded
Had some baggage with me
Very tired
Feeling accused
Need to sort these feelings out
Longing for connection
Feeling betrayed and criticized
Not able to live up to others’ expectations
Neither my own
Longing for friendship
Fellowship
Space to breathe in
A need for passion
For now I am in hiding
From everyone and everything
Yet not from God
Not from myself
Tears build up and escape
In waves
I sense a change
Maybe I am just getting more tired
Some people prefer speed and action
To me relationships come first
Some people love the doing
I am more into human being
I hear the wind howling
It is raining
The Fall has fallen
I am ready to pray
I cry out to the Lord
My God and Creator
The One who loves me
Calls me their Beloved
You my God
I thank you because you see
You see us in our existence
You see us in our wilderness
You experience our joy
Our pain
Longing and sorrow
Allways there
I live with You
You live in me
I breathe your life
My innermost is You
In our deepest longing
You are there
Deep within us
And all around
You who lives in all
Given us all your life
I call upon you
Longing to be near you
The rain is hammering
Good to be inside
Alone
Yet together
My God is here
The Divine
My all my life
My call
I desire guidance
To live from within
I am ready
Now
The rain stops
It is silent
Very silent
I am in the waiting
I am sitting here all prepped and ready
Ready for a presentation about the English-speaking-world
I am in survival mode
This is my ego show
*
It is one of many tests
Tests to help my ego consolidate and grow
I am all in for it now
Ready – go
*
Little do I yet know
This is only a necessary show
Before the greater exam
Which is yet come
*
It will come later
At a time I am ready
This is no joke
No fun time, no show
*
Yet I must learn
That my ego must burn
This exam will feel like dying
But I will strike gold
A mystic is like an open room
An open room where experience can happen
The key to this open room is surrender in silence
Surrender to Spirit
Spirit fills this open room
The open room of a mystic
I deeply desire to live with God
To be a communicator and teacher of a good and lifegiving message
I believe God sees the heart
At least I choose to believe
Discouragement and loneliness can set in
It is a fact that I am no more special
No more special for God than others
He/She who loves all and the whole of creation
The longing to be special can be traced back to my childhood
The fear and restlessness and longing from back then
What shall I do
Receive myself accept myself value myself
Then trust the road to open up
Along with each step I take
I am contemplating living from the center. By center I mean living from your true self as some like to call it. You may also call it the Seat of Self. It is the center were mystics of all religions and spiritual traditions meet. This center is what helps me “see” that I as a Christian have a lot in common with a Sufis and a Kabbalists. Even though there are many things I don’t know about those other traditions.
I think it is very helpful for people at different stages in their lives to truly see and find their center. This center which can be found within us, is something other than our ego, thoughts and feelings. The more we live from this center and “look out” from it, the more we realise what’s important in our lives and relationships. When we relate to ourselves in this way, it helps us accept and relate to others and the world in a calmer and more genuine and even forgiving way.
I have chosen this image above for many reasons. First of all, and reason enough in itself, was that I found it very beautiful. Secondly, I liked the way the flower was darker on its edges and brighter in the center. It works as a symbol for the spiritual life, yes even as a symbol for the human life. Living through our darkness reveals to us more and more what we need to see to truly live from our hearts, our deepest selves.
Living in the darkness of one of those flower petals can be a terrible experience. The petal is great as well, so can the dark times be. For some these darker times become dark nights of senses and the soul, as John of the Cross wrote so fervently about.
In Buddhism I believe there are expressions like bright darkness or luminous darkness. And even as a Christian I think that is a beautiful description. What seems to be the darkest of night may reveal healing truths so night is transformed into the brightest of day. After the deepest darkness there can be an experience of great light, even joy and bliss.
I believe that if more people started to practice sitting in silence or for example practice centering prayer, they would eventually find and see the beautiful truth of living from center, or living from a different center than we normally do. That is, living from our deepest Self, which is Love, instead of our ego and very often reactive feelings and thoughts.
If you were to lay aside the thoughts and feelings stirring for a few minutes in silence during your day, this may be very difficult, but yet you may also be in for a beautiful surprise. But beware, you may have to pass through long stretches of darkness, sorrow and pain, to find this bright shining Light! For the darkness is always luminous. Blessings to you on your journey!
A Contemplative Life 